BARGAIN HUNT.......for your last minute shopping!!

HEY EVERYONE!!

Well......it's about a week until Christmas......and I am still taking last minute orders for prints and paintings......I am pleased that I have so many last minute shoppers!!

SO-- if you want something for that special person - you gotta email me this week!!

Pitter patter!

;-)

In the meantime, I went for brunch for the first time in AGES....and then a trip to The V.V. Boutique!

Here are my finds....

Just....you know.....playing the Mandolin.....
GET IT?? A little play on words there!

THIS was locked up....because people are JONESING for a little holiday Billy Shakes!
I assume  "Living Shakespeare" is a self-help program.....

ARE YOU frustrated that you love Olivia but Olivia loves Cesario who is really Viola, who is in love with you? TIRED of people trying to kill you to take the throne? Looking to plan revenge against your murdering uncle??
Try "Living Shakespeare" for 4 weeks, and you'll be enjoying that forbidden love.....then taking poison faster than you can romp through the Forest of Arden!!

Yup - holiday Shakespeare jokes -- it has come to that!!
Anyways....

....also in the case....these shoes......makes PERFECT SENSE!

This guy seems a little smug about his book.
You know how some book readers are......am I right??

HOLIDAY MUGS!!
CLAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSY!

Poor Ariel had never been inoculated for fish pox.......
No voice and weepy face sores?
HOW WILL SHE LAND HER MAN NOW?

I am not sure what bothers me about these......
CAN YOU TELL ME????

Pre and post taping of "Dora's "Muy Bueno Mardi Gras Special"!

Oh those crazy Dutch.
That's what you get for buying discount skates!
;-)
(that was for my Duchies!!!)

The "good shoes" are locked up, and yet........

Winter Crocs.
Dear buyer.....I hope you lose a toe to frostbite.
There.
I said it!

OMG you guys!
The kids are totally into pinning this year!!!
#TOOCOOL
#NeverGonnaBeBeatenUpInTheSchoolyardWearingThese
#@isTheNEW!

Men's PJs.
I KID YOU NOT!
What kind of a lunatic buys this????????

.....oh wait.....nevermind......

Enlarge this photo and take a good luck at the guy in orange (coat and skin)......
....poor Lars looks like he goes to Donald Trump's stylist....no?

I think I read this wrong....
I thought it said "Wine is the friendship of life"!
Still makes sense to me!

I found this LOOSE.
The Greenwood's were never the same after Sandra found Ken's "other" family.

Yup.
Teach your child to lie and get away with it....

Which one of these "silly safari" names sounds the least like either a sexual proclivity or derogative term.......
Midge
Squitor
Butter
Gugle
Sheeger
YUP - they all sound OFFENSIVE!

You're welcome folks!!!

Get quick to the Value Village to pick these up before Christmas!

BARGAIN HUNT #5

Another wonderful Brunchday Sunday!

Here is how I spent it:

At the St Lawrence Market......there was this.......
I know I am a man-child - but I had a BUNCH of "cockshut" jokes.....
Just imagine.

The perfect Christmas gift for that special person in your life!

It's "Play Time" for the kids!
What'll it be?
Disney ToyStory game?
Playing Guitar Rockstar?
or the non-slip spinning dog treat toy?
WHO'S A GOOG BOY???

I like that it is an acronym, but I thought it was:
J is for - just who is your favourite actor that played you in a movie....is it Christian Bale - c'mon - you can say!
E is for - every time Lorraine Stewart makes up an acronym, does it need to be such a downer, GEEZ!?
S - is for shoes....honestly, don't your feet get sore in dem sandals?
U is for - understanding that some people are just not that into organized religion....
S is for so......you don't want to talk about the whole priest thing??
or is it simpler?? Like:
J- judging
E- every
S- single
U- un-believing
S- sonnamabitch

I'd love to hear your JESUS acronym! (but not any hate mail please)

To the trash
of a not great friend
the way
is almost certain

How about this BIG EYED 70's illustration.
SPEAKING of big eyes......

Yes.......in order.....it is.....
1. Topless Brat
2. Bottomless upside-down Barbie
3. Leering Austin Powers
NO STAGING HERE!! HONESTLY!!!!!!!!

...and on top.....it was this awful Jersey Man Whore  Shore doll.
Ew.

Dear Wendy and Matt,
I am so glad to have shared your special day.
That dry chicken, pay bar, and the great train whistle you gave us
was well worth my $150 gift of cash! 

.....all this jewelry.......final sales Ladies!!
I bought the invisible string of pearls, and a transparent diamonte owl broach! 

These are funny....and don't need my snarky comments!
:-)

Yes......it is hard being a kid!
So hard, they NEED an ergonomic neck pillow!
Or you start getting complaints from HR....

Ew. Just EW!!!!

Crochet is the new silk!
Pass it on!

Ah yes.
The infant toys......and the Electrical Testing Area......
together again!!!!

The British are coming!
I like how they are ALL in some form of curtsy!

Why is this so wrong??? 

"I don't know Jane, I just can't decide which bag to choose,
it IS a formal Easter party....beaded clutch or felt chicken???"

Let's play a game of 'perv-y or pure'!
I know what my guess is!

Two hearts - One love - Two lives - One dream
Feel like this needs a third.......
SO WHAT COMES NEXT?
Two much - One thinks
Two affairs - One divorce
Two hands to cover my mouth from vomiting
WHAT'S YOUR GUESS?

I love the "share it girl"......the boy to her left that is not having it, and the fact that all the kids are looking AWAY from both the camera and Bill (the fist pumper)!
Way to go Rosenshontz! 

This is my new MOTTO!!!!
OR
I'd rather be someone's alcohol induced blackout than everyone's cup of tea!

There you go! '

Another WUNNERFUL Sunday!

BARGAIN HUNT #4

HEY HOWDEE!
Let's get to it, I went to the Value Village (aka The V.V. Boutique) on Sunday, and found come things that I feel like you may need to have in YOUR life......let's look at the bargains......

Sisters......
..OF MURDER???????
Yikes!

FAME - the record! On the front you will see ALL the students......
...all the faculty is on the back....

.....oh....except Doris......
WAA WAA WAAAAAAAAAA

Mmmmm.....now imagine them in a nice stew - or a red sauce.
WHAT?? Too dark?? 

The new 'Sarah Yoder' doll!
(ya..that was my try at an Amish joke)

NOW WITH "SEE INTO YOUR SOUL" EYES!

This bag of toys sponsored by Male Body Dysmorphia.
You're welcome boys!

Look at his feet.....that loin cloth must be made of some strong material.

This guy really should be in the previous bag.
Just saying.

I WILL NOT REST until the filthy gay agenda is ABOLISHED from the Value Village!
FIIIIIILTH!!!!

Which of these 'girls games' is great for nurturing young minds:
1. "Totally Me" - tattoo craft art kit
2. "Create your own Dollhouse"
3. "Glitter Bottle painting set"
4. "Marry, Date or Dump"
5. Barbie Puzzle
WOW.
EVERYTHING A YOUNG GIRL NEEDS TO KNOW!

OKAY - it's time for another game of "Why is THIS in the locked case?":

2 Flashlights - WITH batteries -- Priceless - literally!

2 action figures (and they are only $9.99 each??)

This.
Honestly - can you tell me WTF this is???

Meanwhile in the Men's department.......

Wife: Hey Jim, why don't you go try on these activewear pants.
Husband: But I also need shoes!
Wife: Oh. Well how about these lovely wedges?
Husband: I was actually thinking more of a sexy kitten heel.....
Wife: Thank goodness they are also right here!Husband: Beth, I think I wanna also try on a lacy camisole. 

WHO LOVES HOOKING??
I used to hook, my Mom got me a lion rug when I was a young boy.....it was time consuming!
Seriously! There was one summer when I was pretty heavy in to hooking!

HIDDEN POTENTIAL!!!
Just put 2 things together to repurpose them!
Let's see if the ads are right....

HOLY CRAP THIS LOOKS GOOD!!!
Take a mason jar - add silk flowers - you get a "shabby chic centrepiece"
Way to go Rob.....but can you do it again?

You can turn a fire extinguisher - INTO A LAMP!!!!
Ah-MAH-Zing!!!
Way to go Rob.....but can you do it a THRID TIME??

Rooster Trivet + Teapot = cock teas!
Okay one more time.....find the hidden potential.......

Creepy bear toy + Broken wagon
= child catching cart!
Way to go Rob!

Poor thing.
Little did she know she would gain all that weight and sleep with tonnes of men.
Oh...and poor Fergie too!

......ROYAL FAMILY YEARBOOK....
The REAL Big Book of British Smiles!

What is THIS backstory?
She went to Costco, to pick up her 36" x 24" photo plaque of her baby....
AND THEN WHAT??
It is still wrapped in the plastic here............

Add caption

That's right. You can pass around the Salt and Pepper in these CLASSY holders.
Yes. They actually say "full of S" and "full of P"
EW.

Finally I leave you with this chilling print.
I don't call this one "Recess Bell", I call it
"Mrs. Brown hangs her entire class".

I hope you enjoyed this trip to the VV Boutique!
If you are looking at buying ANY of these things......GET THERE NOW!!
Have a good week y'all, and I HOPE TO SEE YOU AT THE POP-UP on Thursday!!!!!